I bolted out of bed this morning (well, not bright and early so I’m actually kind of bummed) with thoughts soaring through my head. I am going to have to write them all down, and then figure out how to get them all done!
Have you ever felt completely lost?
I have. I still do.
For the past month or so, I’ve felt it stronger than before. I’ve been out of university for a year and it feels like there is so much I want to do, but feel I can’t do.
Like starting this blog. I was nervous, scared even. But what was I afraid of?
I studied writing in school. I write in my free time. I even have a poetry blog. Writing is my passion. What am I so scared of?
A little criticism? I know, it’s a fact of life for this field.
My mother tells me: “You have to believe in yourself.”
There was a day, back in high school, when I turned in a poem of mine for extra credit. The teacher, three days later, handed it back to me and whispered– “you really need to get this published. You can do it.”
Then I went to university. The first year I debated whether or not to get involved with our literature journal, the Brushfire. By August of the second year, I finally gave up on being shy or nervous and joined it. By the time I graduated, I was assistant editor and having the best time of my life.
Then I graduated. All of that ended. I wasn’t going to school for a master’s, and I felt lost. I went home for the summer,wondering how to make it in this great big world everyone warned me of. And I’ve been looking, for the past 8 months, for something, somewhere, to house my thoughts, creativity and well, feeling like a part of a group.
I found an amazing job through a friend– and it’s helped. I enjoy it– and it doesn’t feel like a job:)
But I still feel I’m missing something.
How does this all connect? It connects to today– the first day of the rest of my life, because tomorrow isn’t here and yesterday is gone. It connects to this blog– where I want you all to feel your dreams are just within reach. Where I need to believe in myself and my own dreams.
Which leads me back to right now, where, in my head, dozens of thoughts for poems, short stories and songs are dancing around in my head like sugar plum fairies.
I have to know that today is the only day I have– I have to live it like it was my last. No regrets, no wishing it could have been done differently. Because it’s all I have.
Thanks for listening:)
Have you ever been afraid to follow your dreams? Was there a time where you finally told yourself to stop hiding? Comment below or send me an email to WritingLoveMagic(at)gmail.com.